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by Ambertolina

This is a plea aimed at Hollywood. And I guess just parents in general.

Ian Fleming's brilliant book

When my husband and I had a kid and she turned four or so, it was a great excuse to purchase my most favorite musical of all time, Mary Poppins. The next logical movie to purchase after Mary Poppins was Chitty Chitty Bang Bang, which I’d never seen. Seeing as how Chitty Chitty Bang Bang is one of my most favorite books of all time, I figured we couldn’t go wrong.

Both movies are musicals that star Dick Van Dyke, but these movies are in no way equal, dear reader. Mary Poppins is chock-full of award winning songs, clever dialogue, a delightful plot and exemplary performances by all actors involved.

Chitty Chitty the movie, on the other hand, runs out of gas pretty quickly. The songs are bleh, the acting is meh and the plot is feh. The daughter asked to watch it last night and as I sat there suffering through, I was compelled to dig out my copy of the NOVEL Chitty Chitty Bang Bang, and re-read it for the thousandth time.

The more I read, the madder I got. Chitty Chitty Bang Bang the book is a bit of deliciously witty brilliance written by Ian Fleming, the dude who wrote the James Bond thrillers. The movie version of Chitty Chitty was produced by Albert R. Broccoli, who produced the James Bond movies, and the screenplay for Chitty Chitty the movie was written by Roald Dahl, a friend of Fleming’s whom you might recognize as the author of Charlie and the Chocolate Factory.

How Fleming’s own “friends” could fuck up his book so badly is beyond me.

Shitty Shitty Bang Bang

So here’s my plea to Hollywood: somebody please, please, please make the movie Chitty Chitty Bang Bang properly. I think Hugh Laurie would make a great Commander Caracatus Pott. And here’s my plea to parents: Until Hollywood PROPERLY makes this book into a movie, don’t even bother showing this travesty to your kids.

Read them the book, which is SCRUMTRALESCENT.

Trust me on this.